Stay, Downsize, or Start Over?

Decisions every 70ish individual will need to make.

The day I missed the fourth step at the bottom of the stairs in my former dwelling, a 3-bedroom, 2.5-bathroom townhome, was the day I started searching for my next home.

It was a stopover that I’d hastily leased after my LTR ended nearly four years ago. Kona loved playing on the stairs, but at 64, I was nearing retirement, and the accidental hard landing on my chest was the wakeup call.

At 70ish, your house is no longer just a house

It is a strategy. For some, it’s a retirement plan. For others, it’s a money pit.

Whether you ultimately decide that staying, downsizing, or relocating entirely is the smart choice for you, there is no moral high ground in any of the choices.

There’s an emotional weight to your home

A home stores memories; it also stores maintenance.

Independence and isolation can feel similar inside the same walls. There’s a big difference between loving a home and being anchored by it.

You might ask yourself this question:

If this house were sold tomorrow, what would I actually miss? The structure, or the stories?

At some point, we all realize we are heating rooms we never enter.

When staying put makes sense

Here’s an ideal lifestyle sketch for most 70ish individuals:

• One-level living or a modifiable layout with one or two steps

• A walkable neighborhood with access to grocery, pharmacy, and transportation

• Manageable upkeep or affordable help

Depending on your needs, aging-in-place modifications might include grab bars, better lighting, railings, and wider doorways.

Important Point:
Staying is not denial if it is strategic.

Action prompt:
Walk through your home as if you are 85 and using a cane. What becomes difficult?

Downsizing: less space, more freedom

I’ve witnessed many Boomers who are set in their ways and never see themselves leaving their family home. It’s where they raised their children, and, for many, it represents decades of stability and memories.

They raise the usual common objections:

• “I worked my whole life for this.”

• “The kids will miss the family home.”

• “What will I do with all my stuff?”

But, on the other side of the equation are:

• Lower utility bills - no more heating and cooling unused rooms

• Fewer repairs — or none with a maintenance team

• Condo or apartment living versus a smaller house

• Emotional fatigue from maintaining unused space

Here’s an exercise you might find enlightening:
List the rooms you use weekly. That number is your real house. The other rooms represent more expense.

For my townhome, it was my 1) the primary BR suite, 2) the kitchen, and 3) the living room. Only three rooms*. I was paying for two extra rooms and their heating and cooling.🙄

Downsizing is often seen as a retreat from a higher standard of living to a lower one. But that’s not the right framework.

Instead, think of downsizing as editing your lifestyle. If you have three sets of holiday china and no holiday guests, it may be time to reconsider square footage.

*I now live in a three-room, 1 bedroom/1 bath ground floor apartment that I love. It has a gas fireplace, full-size appliances, and in-home washer/dryer units. It’s perfect for me and Kona, the WonderDoodle.

Starting over: relocating at 70ish

Retirement relocation typically depends on two main factors:

1. Moving closer to family

2. Moving to a State with a lower cost-of-living, or

3. Moving to a 55+ community if family is local

Relocation cons

However, there are some risks involved in relocation that need to be considered beforehand.

You’ll undergo a social reset; you’ll leave behind friends and fellow members of your faith. You’ll lose your favorite doctor, dentist, or other healthcare professional, and sometimes, even the Medicare plan you enjoy. Finally, there is a change in climate adaptation.

When I relocated from drought-affected California to the rain-drenched Pacific Northwest, well, let’s just say, although I love the rain, there’s a crap-ton of it. 🙄

Relocation pros

Alongside the drawbacks you might experience in a relocation, there are definite benefits such as:

• Built-in community

• Lifestyle alignment, and

• Financial resets (if relocating to a state with a lower cost of living)

Reflection question:
Am I moving toward something, or only away from something?

The solo reality factor

Here’s a unique aspect of the 70ish and living solo crowd:
No one else is weighing in or sharing the burden.

Because 70ish folks choose or find themselves living solo, they also may experience decision fatigue. It’s a hard reality check to realize there is no one to bounce your ideas off.

The importance of an outside perspective eventually becomes necessary. Options include talking with a financial planner, a trusted friend, or an adult child without surrendering autonomy.

Don’t make fear-based moves after one bad winter or one expensive repair.

So, where does this leave you?

At 70ish, what is usually your final housing decision comes down to three choices:

• Staying with intention (assumes a sustainable financial status)

• Downsizing with clarity to save on expenses and upkeep

• Relocating with purpose to be near friends and family

Here’s a suggested exercise:

This week, calculate the true monthly cost of your current home, including maintenance averages. This clarity will help reduce the anxiety around a monumental decision.

Remember, it’s never too early to gather input from friends and family as long as you communicate that it’s your decision to make.

Maintaining your autonomy is critical. 💪🏼